Not an Academic

White slatted window blinds in an ivory tower. #mytransformationadventure, week 10.

As I share my transformation adventure, I am stripping away what no longer fits me and honoring the humble road that is left to travel. As my previous blog posts reveal, I am no longer (or just not) many things and one of them is an academic. I’ve worked in academia for many years and have earned my terminal degree. I have researched and published, professed and directed others doing the same. I’ve built and bridged but not belonged. My stint in academia was a blip on their radar, though my students may feel differently.

These academic experiences, however, do come from my identity—not as one who studies what they want to know, but as one who knows those whom they study. There are now so many others who are studying and teaching great things for you to learn and know that I can comfortably leave these efforts in their extremely capable hands.

I joined the academic world to reach more than one organization at a time. I wanted to grow an army of leaders in all levels of organizations, across all industries. I was tired of working alone and barely making a dent in the organizational need around us. So I began to teach, to run programs, and build more. But it wasn’t enough. There were problems advanced degrees could not teach nor could credibly address.

Now that I have let go of my illusion of being the academic that I am not, I can be the me you need to see. There are things I need to tell you; things you’ve repeatedly asked to learn. I was beholden to others and an image I didn’t dare betray. But those days are done. With respect and compassion and fears to allay, I embark on a new adventure (and will share all the way. Wink.)!

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